Because He lives I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives all fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
My life is worth the living
Just because He lives.

BB went into a full time extended health facility yesterday. it was one of the hardest days of my life. Leaving her behind to find her way in her new place without any familiarity. She's so confused. A shadow of her former self.

I signed the papers today with the powers that be and went home and had a good cry.

Not a great day. Bless BB Lord. Give her strength for this new path to follow. She belongs to You. You alone are her Rock and Shield.

Lost in Translation

Yesterday I got an email from a cousin in Holland asking about my mom's health. I had to laugh. I had written a cousin from the other side of the family to let my dad's side know what was up with BB. The only contact I have there is with my aunt who doesn't speak any English. My cousin was nice enough to write her a note.

My aunt was of course wanting more information so knowing her son speaks some English, got him to write me.

What I received was..."we hear it is difficult for Tante B who has fallen. Also she is now mentally retarded."

Not quite what I was thinking.......yesterday Chris went on her own to visit her. BB told her all about the orchards she was planting. Gotta love her. I appreciate Chris visiting her though and spending time with her.

BB is becoming a shadow of her former self. She's losing her mental capabilities as well as her physical. Her memory is quickly fading and she's asking questions that she well knows the answer to.

Yesterday we were sitting in the lobby of the hospital talking about Hawaii and how she likes to sit in the lobby of the hotel where we stay and all of a sudden she says ' how come John hasn't come to visit me?' I just looked at her and said, "really Mom? do you remember what happened to John?" then she started to cry as she remembered he passed away.

She has a very good team of social workers, OT, PT, Dr.s and Health Care Liasons. We are praying for the very best spot to open up for her.

BB, be at peace. God has it all under control.

BB has now moved to Acute Care for Elderly, the ACE ward. She has a private room and more nursing care. She will stay there until there is room for her in rehab somewhere else.

She is more confused and anxious about why she's there than anything else. I have been to the hospital every day and getting a little weary. Next week I will have to taper my visits down to every other day because the following week I am going back to work on a graduated basis.

So much life happening around here right now. Lord, give us strength.