Chris and I went to Kamloops for the weekend to 'mend fences' with my brother and his wife. Because of some misunderstanding and past hurt feelings we haven't visited each other in several years.

The first time they met Chris was when my brother John passed away and hardly a good time to a) tell him I'm gay and b) introduce him to my significant other.

Years went by and we hardly spoke and then it became nothing at all.

Then in August I got an email and that started things rolling in the right direction. Emails passed back and forth and Chris and I made plans to go and see them.

It was a great visit. The feeling of awkwardness disappeared and we were back to just hanging out and laughing. My brother and I have always laughed a lot together and teased each other and bantered back and forth. Chris kept saying 'you're so much alike'. I had forgotten how much alike we really are.

Today my mom called and asked 'so what's new?' and I told her we went to Kamloops. Things got quiet. My brother and mother never speak and basically I've laid down the ground rules.

You 2 talk to each other and leave me out of it. I am NOT getting in the middle. I will have a relationship with you (Mom) and I will have one with you (Ralph).

And that's the way it is.....families.